What Could Have Been
by Raging Kitsune
Summary: Tune contemplates what might have been if she had told Ernest the truth.


Begun on June 21, 2002

Completed on June 28, 2002

*January 7, 2004: Fixed a couple of typos that bothered me*

A little Tune and Ernest piece.

__

What Could Have Been

By Silver Kitsune

Tune leaned over the hangar railing listlessly, a pink rose dangling between her fingertips. She began to absently twirl it around, watching the petals begin to blur together into a continuous stream of color.

The world seemed to retreat away, leaving only this delicate flower. It was all she had left, the only tangible link.

_'I never knew that life could feel so empty...'_

Running her fingers over the smooth petals, a soft sigh escaped past Tune's lips.

_'If only...'_

She could feel her hand begin to tremble. She wanted to cry, but there were no tears left to shed.

_'If only...'_

Her whole body began to shake, but still the tears wouldn't come.

_'If only...'_

A gentle arm wrapped around her shoulder, startling her from her thoughts and causing the rose to slip between her fingers, dropping towards the depths below.

Tune's eyes widened as she watched the flower begin to plummet. She stretched out her hand, leaning over the railing in her futile struggle to recapture the fallen object.

"Tune," Leena murmured softly, carefully pulling Tune back to the floor.

The young repairer started to become hysterical, reaching back over the railing. "No! It's... I have to get it back!"

"Shhh..." Leena soothed, pulling the panicked girl back again. She wasn't quite sure what Tune had dropped, but it seemed to be of the utmost significance. "We'll go down and get it."

Tune's desperate eyes gazed up at Leena, pleading that they hurry.

The two girls made their way over the catwalk and boarded the elevator, quickly traveling down to the ground. When they had reached the bottom, Tune took off in a run toward where the object had fallen. Leena chased after her, trying to keep up with Tune's impassioned speed.

As they drew closer, Leena began to make out something small that was settled on the floor at the feet of Klein. She squinted, trying to see what it was.

Tune suddenly stopped running, and Leena bumped into her.

"Tune?"

Tune was shaking again as she stared at the object.

_'If only...'_

Leena's eyes widened as she saw what it was. "That flower..."

Tune stared at the rose, its stem broken from the fall. A few of its leaflets had broken away, leaving a trail of blushing petals.

_'If only I had told him.'_

* * * * *

The sound of approaching footsteps caused Ernest to glance up. He found his repairer take a few hesitant steps forward before stopping.

"What is it Tune?" he asked, studying her serious face. He sensed that there was something troubling her. She needed to speak about something of importance.

Tune offered him a faint smile. "Anou... is this all right?" she asked nervously.

While Ernest had wanted to be alone to think, he found Tune's presence a welcome intrusion. "Mm," he murmured with a smile and a nod.

"It's not that I could ever have an opinion on this matter..." Tune began nervously, playing with the fabric of her coat. She hesitated, but felt compelled to continue. "Demo..."

Ernest met her gaze evenly, though sadness still lingered in his pale eyes.

"Someone has to stop Gareas-san now. I don't think he can stop himself..."

"I know," Ernest said, looking away.

Tune quickly looked down, knowing that she was upsetting him. "Gomen nasai." She paused, taking in a silent breath. "I'm being intrusive, aren't I?"

"No, not at all," Ernest replied, turning to face her again.

Tune felt his reassurance and began to smile again. Then her eyes fell on Ernest's bruised fist.

"Your hand is wounded..."

"Oh, that was-" Ernest began, trying to pass the situation off nonchalantly.

Tune took a few brisk steps forward and gently cupped the bruised flesh between her own small hands.

"Ernest-san, you're not wrong," she told him, looking up meet his gaze. "You're worried about Gareas-san more than anyone else." She smiled at him warmly, showing her sincerity.

But Ernest knew what she felt in her heart. "Tune..."

Tune withdrew her hands and looked down again. "I shouldn't have said anything..."

Ernest reached out and briefly rested a hand on her shoulder. "No, I'm glad you did."

Tune blinked in surprise as she felt the contact pass between them.

"Your words are a comfort..." Ernest softly informed her, running a hand over his bruised knuckle.

"I'm glad..." Tune murmured. Her heart started to beat a little quicker.

Ernest could feel her emotions reaching out, as though there was something else she needed to say.

"Ah, well... I, um, need to finish some work on Klein..." Tune managed to sputter out, quickly turning to make her exit.

_'Not today... I'm not ready yet. There will always be tomorrow...'_

* * * * *

_'If only...'_

'If only I had told him.'

* * * * *

Tune was about to step out the door when something caused her to stop.

_'I mustn't be afraid...'_

"Ernest-san..."

Ernest glanced up again, his eyes inquisitive.

_'I mustn't be afraid...'_

Tune met his gaze boldly, though she could only manage a faltering step forward. "There's something I need to tell you."

Ernest nodded, his stance inviting her to come closer.

Tune took another shaky step, still meeting Ernest's eyes. "I..."

Her strong feelings were washing over Ernest. He didn't even need contact to feel them, so strong were they. He could sense her hesitation, as well, and the fear that gripped at her heart.

"What's wrong?" Ernest asked, his tone sympathetic.

"I... I mean..."

_'Don't be afraid!'_

"It's just that.-"

_'Just tell him!'_

"It's not really important. Never mind..." she finally came out with as she turned away.

_'Believe in yourself!'_

Tune closed her eyes tightly, mustering up all that was within her. "I love you!"

Silence fell over the small corridor.

Tune wasn't really sure how long she stood there, her eyes still squinched shut. It seemed like an eternity before the stillness was broken.

"I'm sorry..."

Tune whirled around in surprise. "'Sorry?'" she repeated softly.

Ernest let his fingers trail over the railing. "Perhaps I've always known... and yet... I never realized..."

Tune watched him quietly, her closed hand resting over her mouth. Her wide violet eyes remained unblinking as she tried to come to terms with the world that was suddenly spinning rapidly around her.

"Your soul and mine... they're always reaching out toward one another." Ernest commented, finally meeting her gaze again and offering her his serene smile.

That smile always comforted her. She found the courage to speak her next words. "I know... where your heart lies."

Ernest's smile widened. "Do you?" he asked, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he spoke.

Tune blushed. "You... I mean... anou... Gareas-san..."

Ernest laughed softly. "Aa, Gareas is very precious to me."

Tune was startled by the admission. "You... I mean... I don't want to... I don't expect you to-"

Ernest carefully pressed a finger over her lips, silencing the confused words.

"Tune... I'm glad that you could be so courageous. Your feelings have always been crying out to me. Now I understand."

Tune was startled as she felt Ernest's lips brush over hers in a brief, feather-light kiss.

"You're my partner. No one is more important."

Tune watched as he began to make his way towards the door. He paused, turning back to face her one more time.

"You always have to try things. That way you'll have no regrets."

Tune froze as she saw the strange look in Ernest's eyes. It was like nothing she had seen in him before. Something was wrong...

But as quickly as it appeared, it disappeared. The door closed behind Ernest, leaving Tune to herself.

"Ernest-san..."

...

...

...

What the hell are you doing? Eeva Leena! Luhma Klein!

Don't break formation!

Ernest, withdraw!

Where is Ernest?

I've caught it!

Luhma Klein's armor won't hold for long!

Use me to target him.

This is no time for jokes...

We're getting Luhma Klein back!

I can't go on anymore...

Ernest!

Respond!

Ernest!

_Ernest!_

ERNEST!

...

No regret.

...

If only...

...

If only...

...

Everything was red. The cockpit was red. A few pink pearls trailed away from...

...

A few pink pearls trailed away from...

...

Away from the corpse.

...

No regret.

...

If only...

* * * * *

Tune collapsed to her knees, cradling the fallen rose in her arms. The pink petals were scattered everywhere.

Leena stared at her friend crumpled on the hangar floor.

"That's from... Ernest's casket..." she murmured, staring at the pink rose.

Tune continued to stare at the rose. It's body was crushed and broken, leaving a trail of pink pearls. Just like the body inside the cockpit. Just like it.

Leena dropped down beside Tune, wrapping her arms around her. "Tune..."

Tune threw herself into Leena's embrace. "I can't... I never..." She collapsed into a fit of dry sobs.

Leena waited patiently, stroking Tune's silvery hair.

Even after the sobs had ended, the two remained settled together, finding comfort in the others' presence.

Time began to elapse as the two repairers sat on the hangar floor.

"It hurts..." Tune finally whispered.

"I know," Leena murmured soothingly.

"You can't know..." Tune replied, dropping her head.

"Maybe I can't... understand the full extent of your feelings. I don't know what I would do if I lost Garu... But I lost someone that I cared for, as well. Ernest... he was special to all of us..."

Tune shook her head. "Even if you lost Gareas-san, you would not experience the pain that I feel right now."

Leena looked taken aback.

"Because you know where you stand with him. You've said what you need to say. You have no regrets."

Leena pulled Tune closer, tucking her chin against the other girl's hair. She closed her eyes, trying to take in what Tune was saying.

"If only I had told him..." Tune whispered into Leena's arms. "What if I hadn't walked out of the room that day? What could have happened? What if I had just said it... told him that I... that I loved... that I love him."

Leena sighed, not knowing what to say. She could never imagine herself in Tune's situation. All she could do was be there.

Tune accepted Leena's silence gratefully, glad that she didn't try to offer some sort of remedy or cure for the pain. Nothing could heal the silent wounds buried within her.

The tears soon began to flow again, letting emotions flow freely from Tune's soul.

'_If only...'_

The rose slipped from between her fingers to the cold floor.

_'But there was no "if only"...'_

Tune began to cry harder, allowing the emotions that she had long kept hidden begin to emerge into the world.

_'All that's left is regret.'_

~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Further proof that Kitsune is on crack. I don't even really like this fic... but we've bonded. It's just something different that I randomly felt inspired to write. Ignore the lame symbolism that I felt the strange urge to use. Though I did enjoy the little montage of images from episode 8... probably because I didn't have to write the dialogue ^_- Um, yes. The end.


End file.
